Hey there, lovelies! I’m back again with more LDRs tips. This time, I’ll be sharing with you some long distance relationship do’s and don’ts.
This is going to be very helpful if you are trying to learn how to maintain a long distance relationship. Especially if you are just starting out.
It can definitely be tricky and challenging in the beginning.
Even though I’m not in a long distance relationship anymore (my husband and I closed the distance last year), I still have some knowledge to share!
I keep getting DM’s and emails from you guys, and it always makes me happy to help you out when you feel lost, alone, or need some advice.
Long Distance Relationships Do’s:
1. Have Hard Conversations
When we are in a long distance relationship we need to make sure that we are using the time apart to keep learning about the person that is far away.
Since seeing each other whenever we want is not an option, then you need to make sure that you are getting to know the person.
By hard conversations I mean topics that might be uncomfortable for both of you, and it will tell you about the other person.
For example: their stance in abortions, how to manage money as a couple, if you want kids, how they see themselves in their future (and if you share those goals), etc.
2. Make Time For Video Calls
Sometimes (especially when there’s a big time difference), it’s hard to talk with your significant other in real time; but being in a long distance relations means that you have to make time for the important things. Like talking “face to face”
Even if it means that one person will be waking up super early or going to sleep super late. Take turns and make it work.
Same when someone has a busy schedule. Make time to spend it with you boyfriend or girlfriend. The fact that you aren’t in the same place is not an excuse to not make efforts in your relationship.
This is for sure one of the most important tips to make a long distance relationship work.
3. Try To Visit Each Other
All long distance relationships are different, and all have different distances. So it can can be harder for some people to plan visit when planes are involves, for example. Especially when we are talking about two different countries.
In my opinion, try to plan ahead and make it work somehow. It could be once a month or once a year. Whatever it works for your relationship, but plan ahead.
Touch is a very important component in a relationship, so even if it’s not possible all the time, don’t push it at the bottom of the list. It is a very important element to maintain a healthy long distance relationship.
4. Express Your Love In Every Way You Can
In essence… be romantic. Send letters to each other, gifts, etc. You don’t have to spend a lot of money and you can definitely keep it simple, but never make the other person wonder if you love them or not.
Say the words “I love you” constantly. Say it on a text, a voice message, a video, a call, etc. It’s always good to hear it and say it.
Surviving a long distance relationship can be tricky at first, but it gets easier with time. As long as the couple keeps trying.
Long Distance Relationship Don’ts:
1. Don’t Create A Bigger Distance After An Argument
It’s OK to give each other some time after an argument or disagreement. Fights happen all the time in relationship, but when distance is an issue, you have to be conscious on how you deal with the problems.
Be mindful in how you react or deal with arguments with your partner. The last thing you want is an even bigger distance you won’t be able to come back from.
Remember that going to their house and fix it up in person is not an option. Choose your battles. Sometimes, being upset is not even worth it.
This point is very important to make a long distance relationship work.
2. Don’t Make Your Partner Feel Guilty FOR LIVING Their LiveS
This sounds harsh, but what I mean by this is; that if your boyfriend or girlfriend likes to hang out with friends and do different activities all the time, don’t make them feel guilty for enjoying their time “alone”.
Don’t expect them to just be at home and go to school or work all the time. If you are insecure about them getting new people, let them know. talk about how you feel, but don’t try to change the person.
Just find a way to balance the issue. Maybe tell him to send you a picture of to text you throughout that moment.
Also, this would be great opportunity to reflect on what makes you feel that way. It’s normal to feel insecure or jealous (especially in a long distance relationship), but also have in mind the feelings of your partner.
3. Don’t let your partner doubt your love
When dynamics change in a relationship, it can be worrisome for the part that sees the change.
That’s why is important to keep an open conversation when changes happen, so the other person don’t overthink the relationship.
If you aren’t replying texts on time like you used to, explain the reason. You might be super busy lately, or something has came up that is changing your routine.
Small things like that can open wound super easily. Especially because we aren’t in the same place to see what’s going on, and if something like this happens to you. Ask. You don’t want the anxiety that comes with it.
A healthy communication is really key to maintain a long distance relationship.
4. Don’t jump to CONCLUSIONS
This is a great tip to make a long distance relationship work in the long run. It’s SO easy to come up with different scenarios in our head trying to figure out what happened, that we don’t give the other person the opportunity to explain.
Like I mention above, sometimes things happen in our significant other life that we don’t know or that is so small that might affect the relationship. For example, no texting back timely like before.
That doesn’t mean that they are cheating or doing something that affects the relationship in a bad way. When they tell you they are busy, they probably are.
Or if they go out with friends. Don’t just assume your partner won’t respect you and the relationship. They are just having a good time with friends.
That’s why is so important to not keep secrets. If you are going out, let your partner know.
In general, surviving a long distance relationship might be tough and not for everyone, but it’s definitely worth it once you are able to close the distance.
For more long distance relationships tips, click here.