Dealing with distance in a relationship can be hard at first. Then, it gets a little easier. Especially after you learn how to deal with it. But there’s a point where everything goes downhill again. When the distance is too much and you don’t know what to do to make yourself feel better. To see past those bad thoughts that make you feel more hopeless.
It doesn’t happen to me a lot. Since I’m very positive and I prefer to see the good side, rather than the bad parts of a situation. But with so many changes in my life, is getting harder to focus on the good parts. My boyfriend lives in the US while I’m in Chile, trying to follow the steps to be a good adult. And I’m not having good luck with that. Not knowing when will be next time I will see him, while time passes (too fast for my liking), is starting to get on my nerves. So trying to figure out what to do when the distance is too much, is something I’ve been learning for a while.
[title align=”center” type=”line”]What To Do When The Distance Is Too Much[/title]
First, and the most important thing, don’t lose hope. Whatever your situation is. It’s going to pass and it’s going to be okay. When you know that person is worth it. It doesn’t matter how hard it can get. You will get through it. And I know we want answers as soon as possible. But the reality is, they probably won’t come fast. So, you need to remind yourself why are you doing a long-distance relationship.
The longer you wait for something. The more you appreciate it when you get it. Click To TweetRemember the good moments and don’t get impatient when the distance is too much. You won’t get anything good from that. When I’m in that situation, I need to calm myself and remind me that the day I’ll get to see my boyfriend will come. And is key that you both support each other in that. If you two start feeling like you won’t see each other again. Then the problem gets bigger than it should be. And we definitely don’t want that.
There are moments when my boyfriend feels really sad and hopeless. And it’s me the one who needs to be strong and make him see that it will get better. Time will pass, but there’s no way distance is big enough to separate us. Or sometimes is me who needs to hear those words. That it doesn’t matter how long it takes to be together again. The point is we will get there and all the distress will be forgotten. So, support each other, is essential when the distance is too much
No matter how painful distance can be, not having you in my life would be worse. Click To TweetRead some quotes! I can’t recommend this enough. Reading love quotes always make me feel better. They push me to feel less sad and more positive. And there are so many! Just take a look at Pinterest, you will have millions on there. I always have my favorite ones close to me. They inspire me and recharge me for at least the end of the day. The feeling of missing someone won’t go away easily, especially if you still don’t know when will be the next time you will see your significant other. But be strong!
When the distance is too much, is also good to focus on other things. Keep your mind busy with activities. Doing your favorite hobby, or with daily tasks in your life. Just don’t give yourself time to think or to worry over things you can’t solve at the moment. It’s good to try to find solutions but do it when you aren’t feeling overwhelmed with sad feelings.
Cry. Some people hate showing their feelings or just crying for that matter. That it makes you look weak. But, hey! Who told you you have to be strong all the time? Some scientists say that when you cry, your body gets rid of toxins and waste products. They even say that stifling emotional tears can cause health problems. My point is… free those tears! It won’t solve the main problem, but it definitely helps to feel better when the distance is too much.
- Related: Things People In Long-Distance Relationships Don’t Want To Hear
- Related: Benefits Of Long-Distance Relationships
- Related: How To Survive An International Long-Distance Relationship
What do you do when the distance is too much? It doesn’t necessarily have to be your significant other. It can be a friend, family or your dog. Let me know in the comments!
Sincerely, Melissa
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Style and Life by Susana says
Oh I feel for your beautiful! I was once in a long distance relationship so I undertsand how you feel and are going through. Much love and strength to you. xx
http://www.susanalopessnarey.com/style-life-susana/
Melissa Cruz says
Thank you Susana! <3
Oyinkan Ogunleye says
I think long distance relationships are amazing. It helps you appreciate every second you get to spend with that person.
Melissa Cruz says
Yes! That’s exactly what happens to me!
Miss ALK says
I’ve never been in an LDR but this seems like such good advice for those who are!
xoxo A
http://www.southernbelleintraining.com
Melissa Cruz says
Thank you!
Claire Lee says
That’s pretty intense. I don’t think I can ever be in a long distance relationship! Especially when the time zones are different. But I agree that it’s not impossible – I’ve seen some that successfully worked their way!
Melissa Cruz says
You need to be sure of what you are doing. That helps you on the bad days
Tereza Cityscape Bliss says
I loved reading this article – really helpful, especially because after 2 years we’ve gone from being together every single day to long distance. Its hard but not impossible. x
Melissa Cruz says
Totally agree! It is hard but not impossible!
Cynthia Salgado says
Melissa, I couldn’t agree more as I’ve been there myself. We had to deal not only with distance but also living in different time zones. We are now married and we are settling in South Africa, but the times apart were definitely challenging. I agree with reading quotes and keep yourself busy, those two did wonders for me! And, the wait is worth it!
Melissa Cruz says
Even though we are in different countries. We are lucky to be at the same time zone. Makes communication easier! Thanks for reading, Cynthia!
Amy says
SO many great tips! My boyfriend and I are fortunate we haven’t had to deal with long distance yet, but it might be possible in the up coming months. Will def reference this.
xoxo,
Amy | Pastel N Pink
Melissa Cruz says
Thank you, Amy! If you need some advice just let me know! Distance has some benefits too!
Maegan Clark says
Long distance can be SO hard! These are great tips!
Melissa Cruz says
Thanks, Meagan!
Kim says
Aw. My fiancé and I were long distance (about six hours by car) for 4 – 5 years because of school. It was hard but now it’s finally over and we are together every day! Hopefully you will reach the end and you’ll be so SO happy that you held out and were strong!! Best of luck to the both of you!
I think we saw each other on Skype a lot and talked on the phone whenever we missed each other. Hope that helps!
Kim
Simply Lovebirds
Melissa Cruz says
Thank you, Kim <3 we try to Skype a lot, but he has a different schedule and sometimes is so hard!
Tilley says
My husband (then bf) and I were long distance for a long time and so I know how hard it can be. There is a light at the end though, keep pushing through <3
Melissa Cruz says
Thank you, Tilley! I’m looking forward to that moment <3
mckenna bleu says
These are all great points! Awesome advice for long distance, it can be so hard.
Melissa Cruz says
Thank you McKenna!
Samantha Bender says
I love that you added to cry. Because it’s totally fine and totally necessary to cry when you feel like crying! But I also love being distracted when I’m stressed or upset about anything that I can’t immediately get to. It makes it a lot easier to keep your mind busy.
Melissa Cruz says
Yeah! Both ways helps a lot to feel less sad
Seersucker Sass says
I’m a firm believer that sometimes you just have to cry it out to get it out of your system. Hang in there, love! LDRs can be tough, but it will be so worth it in the end.
XO, SS || Seersucker Sass
Melissa Cruz says
Yes! It really helps!
Rachel@The Confused Millennial says
awe i love this! LDR are so tough. I like that you gave permission to cry <3
Melissa Cruz says
I’m a total crybaby hahaha. And some people just don’t like it while I think is necessary! Thanks for reading, Rachel <3
Ashley Vickney says
I love this! I did long distance for 3.5 years, and it’s not easy. But it’s so worth it! The tips really help, and honestly doing things to distract yourself helps. I was so busy in college sometimes I forgot to miss him!
Melissa Cruz says
Totally worth it! Especially after you realized how much you accomplished as a couple! That’s totally the point. Forgetting about missing that person!
Theresa says
Aw I know the feeling! I moved to New York to pursue my carrer while my boyfriend stayed back in Europe. And while we are back together now, I will NEVER forget the feeling whenever I had to send him off to the airport. Horrible! I am sending my love to you! xx, Theresa
Melissa Cruz says
I know exactly that feeling! It is a very sad situation. Even more after when you know you won’t see him for a while. Thanks, Theresa! <3
Theresa says
Aw yes I know! Sending a big hug!
Jordyn Pamela says
I’ve been in a LDR for almost three years now! And really… I’ve done all of these, haha! They help! Great post, hun! xo
Melissa Cruz says
That’s amazing! They can get so difficult. thanks for reading, Jordyn!
Adriana says
Long distance relationships are no joke! They can be so difficult – I love your take on it! Reading positive quotes is a great tip!
Melissa Cruz says
Yeah! It defiantly boost my mood 🙂
thesophiadiaries says
Totally agree with this!! But I also want to add, ‘plan ahead’, and ‘communicate’ 🙂
Melissa Cruz says
Plan ahead can get difficult. Especially for me since I don’t have a normal schedule and I don’t even know what O will be doing in a week hahaha. But yes, it is very important to have in mind!
Rachel @ STCL says
Long distance can be really tough. I totally agree about finding something else to focus your time on. It really helps distracting yourself with other fun things to keep your mind occupied!
Melissa Cruz says
Yeah! Some days is the best solution!
Jordyn says
Long distance relationships can be SO difficult. I honestly can’t even imagine living in a different country than my boyfriend but I think your positive attitude makes a huge difference. I know even distance with a friend can be hard on the relationship (though maybe not in the same way as a bf). Communication is big and for me words of affirmation are even more important when I don’t see my bf for a long time.
Melissa Cruz says
Communication is key for sure! And it gets so hard sometimes while texting hahaha. Thanks for reading, Jordyn!
Caitlin A says
I totally relate to this article! Distance is so so tough, after two years of distance, my boyfriend finally moved closer to me from another time zone and it made all the difference. Distance definitely helped us to build our trust in each other as well!
Caitlin
LemonadepressBlog.com
Melissa Cruz says
I’m so glad you two live closer now <3 I agree! LDR's have many benefits too.
Holly Habeck says
I love this! I’m in a long distance relationship too, so I totally get how hard it can be not seeing your SO for what feels like forever. My guy is coming home next week for my birthday and I can’t wait 🙂 Keep that positivity going though, I agree that it is SO important! Great tips xx
http://hollyhabeck.com
Melissa Cruz says
Have fun girl! Nothing is better than knowing you will see him too! <3
Nikki Leigh says
Long distance relationships are tough. This is a great post. It will definitely be helpful to those in long distance relationships.
Melissa Cruz says
Thanks, Nikki!
Ruthie Ridley says
I loved this post!! SO sweet and real.
Melissa Cruz says
Thanks, Ruthie! I’m glad you liked it!
Azanique says
This post is so sweet. I did long distance for a year and it was seriously so difficult. Hats off to those who can make it work
– xo, Azanique | http://www.lotsofsass.com
Melissa Cruz says
It is super difficult! Thanks for reading! <3