Hey there, lovelies! Today I’ll be talking about something very important. Especially for those who are starting out with the Law of Attraction.
Even if you are just a Law of Attraction beginner, you know that the main belief is that you attract positive experiences through positive thoughts.
Which can be very easy to misunderstand if you don’t seek advice in those who can help you understand the real essence of the Law of Attraction.

It happened to me as well! I thought that I had to be happy and positive all the time. That I wasn’t allowed to feel disappointed or sad.
I thought that I had to be happy and positive all the time. That I wasn't allowed to feel disappointed or sad. But in reality it was different. Click To TweetSo I asked my Law of Attraction guide. I needed answers to understand how I was going to approach that new “philosophy” in my own mind. Because let’s be real, being happy all the time is not sustainable even if you try.
We are humans. Humans have feelings and life happens and there are things that we can’t control.
After talking about this topic, she explained the following:
There’s a difference between being positive 24/7 and produce constant affirmative thoughts.
Key phrase: affirmative thoughts. And right there my friends, lays the most important difference.
While the Law of Attraction wants you to feel happy and positive, it doesn’t say that you can’t feel other emotions.
While the Law of Attraction wants you to feel happy and positive, it doesn't say that you can't feel other emotions. Click To Tweet
It’s Okay To Feel Sad
You aren’t failing if you don’t experience happiness all the time. Having only happy thoughts is toxic positivity.
Let me explain this further.
Let’s say that whatever you wanted to manifest didn’t happen, or it was not in the way you were expecting it. So you feel disappointed.
That’s super normal. It’s ok. The big difference (and what the Law of Attraction wants you to do) is that you don’t have to stay in that disappointed state the rest of your life.
You want to move on from it and learn. Think about where was the moment that you doubted whatever you wanted to manifest.
Or maybe you couldn’t manifest what you wanted because you changed your mind at some point. By doing that, you confuse the subatomic particles that help you to manifest your dreams.
Recognize And Accept Your Feelings
Toxic positivity in the Law of Attraction is very common; and it can be “dangerous” in a way you aren’t even realizing.
Toxic positivity in the Law of Attraction is very common; and it can be "dangerous" in a way you aren't even realizing. Click To TweetWhen you shrug off your feelings, you aren’t dealing with them. You are simply hiding them to not face the reality of whatever you are dealing with.
The thing is, those feelings are still there, and they will probably go to your subconscious if you don’t recognize and accept them. Which can turn in a real problem and what we want to avoid in first place.
When those “dark” feelings and thoughts go to your subconscious, is when you can start attracting negative experiences. That place is hard to reach because you normally don’t realize you have those feelings or thoughts.

So ‘being happy all the time’ is not what the Law of Attraction is about.
It’s about knowing that everything will be okay. No matter what you are going through.
While it’s okay to feel sad. You don’t want to stay like that for the rest of your life. Acknowledge your feelings and find a way to heal yourself.
- Related: The Power Of A Positive Attitude
Side note: If you are going through a tough situation, I recommend reading about Ho’oponopono. I feel like it’s a great first step before start with the Law of Attraction. I recommend Mabel Katz as well if you want to start out.
In reality, while the Law of Attraction can sound very toxic, it’s really about healing and loving yourself. It’s about being a better person as well.
Spread The Right Message
What I also want to add is that sometimes is hard to talk about this with other people. While we understand the benefits of the Law of Attraction, others might not take it well.
Even more, we need to be careful on how we approach the Law of Attraction to someone who might need it.
Without even noticing, we might be spreading toxic positivity if we don’t know how to communicate the message to others.
Without even noticing, we might be spreading toxic positivity if we don't know how to communicate the message to others. Click To TweetYou don’t want to tell someone: “hey, you are going through this because you are negative in your life”. Or even something like “don’t worry, just be positive. Everything will be ok”, can be toxic positivity.

You mean well, but when people are going through a hard situation, sometimes they are so hurt, they just want to hear different words.
That toxic positivity is why so many people don’t like some wellness bloggers or YouTubers. It seems like their message is that you need to be happy all the time, when in reality, emotions are more complex. We can’t just switch on or off our emotions.
That being said, let’s conclude this by saying that while the Law of Attraction is not based on toxic positivity, the message can easily get misunderstood by others.
While being happy and positive all the time is not sustainable, the advice is to always surround yourself with those with high vibrations. After all, who doesn’t want to feel happy and positive?
And remember to be have more affirmative thoughts instead of just being positive. There’s a difference between genuine optimism and toxic positivity.
Now tell me, what are your thoughts about the Law of Attraction? Do you still think the Law of Attraction is based on Toxic Positivity.
Sincerely,

Tina says
Thank you for your great post! It has reminded me again that it is ok to feel sad/ disappointed. Also that from the moment I acknowledge my feelings my healing process actually already starts. My mind is then clear to find ways to heal myself.
Melissa says
You are very welcome! And yes, the moment you acknowledge those feelings you can start the healing process. So important to be in tune with our feeling and know that is OK to feel that way. Let’s just don’t make it a permanent state.
Lyanna Soria says
Those are some great tips to keep in mind. I believe that we should all accept our feelings whether happy or sad.
Melissa says
Totally! And we need to learn from them and understand why we are felling like that. Avoid feeling is not good.
Amanda says
This was a super interesting read! I do believe that what you put out you get in return, but agree that we’re humans with complex emotions and can’t be positive and happy all the time. Thanks for sharing your thoughts on this!
Melissa says
100% agree with you. The ‘Karma Law’ is definitely I know is true.
Kileen says
This was such a great post! I used to think that I could never ever feel sad or depressed as well! But I have learned over the years that it’s okay to be sad or feel down.
Kileen
cute & little
Melissa says
Exactly! We are humans and as humans we feel different emotions in our lives.
Neely Moldovan says
I have only recently learned more about the laws of attraction and this is fascinating! I really never thought of toxic positivity.
Melissa says
I know! Toxic positivity wasn’t on my radar before learning about the Law of Attraction.